Me: Hey, buddy! That’s some nice hair you have today. I like all the spikes.
Student: Thank you!
Me: Your mom had spiky hair today, too. Did she do yours?
Me: Oh, well you must have done it yourself then, huh?
Me: Who did it then, buddy?
Student (dead serious): A spider monkey.
Student 1: Have I told you about my pet? I have a fish. It’s a Chinese fighting fish.
Student 2: I don’t have a fish. But did you know you can adopt baby sharks? That’s what I’m going to do. It will be the best pet ever.
3-4 year olds
Student 1: Woah! Look at that pond!
Student 2: I know! It’s green! Green is my favorite!
Student 1: Are there sharks in there?
Me: No, buddy. Don’t worry there’s no sharks in there.
Student 1: Are you sure?
Me: Yeah, it’s a pond. Sharks live in the ocean.
Student 2: Well there could be. If there was a stream that went into the pond and that went into a river and that went into the ocean, then there could be sharks here.
Me: Well, you’re not wrong.
Student (4 yo): Miss, can you open this for me?
Me:*holds out hand*
Me: *looks down to see a whole, unpeeled orange*
Context: Distinguishing between different environments found on the island.
Me: So can anyone tell me the difference between the marsh or bay side and the seawall side of the island?
Student: *dripping with sass* Ugh, duh! The wall.
Me: *Internal face palm*